Today

I just started writing this today. I'm so enthusiastic writing this blog. I feel like I'm going to share my thoughts every day like this. 

Turns out... I have felt the same five years ago. In fact I've created this blog 10 years, yet this is the second post i'm writing into this. I'm yawning right now. I don't know I feel sleep or I'm getting bored at this. At the same time while I'm writing the earlier line, I felt attentive. 

This happens every time whenever some one points at you. Even you are pointing a mistake of yours, first you try to write in a positive angle.  Because you want to feel good about yourself. When you start admitting your mistakes, your wrong doings, you will change. You truly change when you realise what you are. 

If you want to know who you are truly, just try to be alone. Notice your behaviour, your actions mainly your thoughts. You think you are good. Imagine this good is on which scale. 

I say I'm not good. I have terrible things in my life. I have hurt people. They may never see my face again. I feel scared talking to a friend who is going to be a spouse of my best friend. I feel i will be judged by my mistakes. I cannot undo things in my life. But you gotta keep your life moving. You may lost some people in your life, you feel lost, you cry, you feel alone, but there are parents, friends out there gets alone if you are not there. 

Staying strong means you control your emotions? Emotions are indeed strong. You have to divert them, otherwise they will blew up your mind.

I know I have started this in arabic ocean and went to pacific ocean. Haha! Still let me post it. Goodnight baby!